Search "life" returned 4024 results:

He is only a page in your life...

He is only a page in your life - But you are the whole life for him
Rating: 140
17Comments

The truth of Life...

The truth of Life -
Rating: 118
9Comments

School...

School - You can choose just two ot them
Rating: 57
8Comments

Working a job you hate shortens your life...

Working a job you hate shortens your life - Maybe it's a good idea to search for a job you like
Rating: 95
7Comments

Keyboard...

Keyboard - If you're a no-lifer, you won't notice anything strange about it
Rating: 40
5Comments

FRIENDS ARE LIKE BOOBS...

FRIENDS ARE LIKE BOOBS - Some are big, some are small. Some are real and some are fake.
Rating: 67
4Comments

Sometimes It's Enough...

Sometimes It's Enough - the simplest gesture for the whole life to get a new meaning
Rating: 33
4Comments

Life is subjective...

Life is subjective -
Rating: 32
4Comments

SUMMER NEEDS TO SLOW THE HELL DOWN...

SUMMER NEEDS TO SLOW THE HELL DOWN -
Rating: 35
3Comments

Yes, sure...

Yes, sure - You will really need this in real life
Rating: 82
3Comments

SILENCE...

SILENCE - silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.
Rating: 54
3Comments

Doesn't matter how many days you have in your life...

Doesn't matter how many days you have in your life - What matters is how much life you have in your days.
Rating: 81
3Comments

Life Was Easier...

Life Was Easier - when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits...
Rating: 33
3Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... (RC)
Rating: 4
2Comments

Graphic in GTA...

Graphic in GTA - Even better
Rating: 27
2Comments

WHY ISN'T THERE SOME CHEAP AND EASY WAY...

WHY ISN'T THERE SOME CHEAP AND EASY WAY - to prove how much she means to me?
Rating: 24
2Comments

I WANTED TO KILL THE SEXIEST PERSON ALIVE...

I WANTED TO KILL THE SEXIEST PERSON ALIVE - But suicide’s a crime
Rating: 43
2Comments

THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE...

THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE - for the first 90 days
Rating: 42
2Comments

NASCAR...

NASCAR - is a colossal waste of gas
Rating: 46
2Comments

LIFE IS SHORT, TIME IS FAST...

LIFE IS SHORT, TIME IS FAST - no replay, no rewind so enjoy every single moment
Rating: 36
2Comments

PRIORITIES...

PRIORITIES - You should see the plasma
Rating: 41
2Comments

Life...

Life - Is full of moments when you can't stop staring
Rating: 110
2Comments

For those who believe, no proof is necessary...

For those who believe, no proof is necessary - For those who don't believe, no proof is possible
Rating: 56
2Comments

A great pleasure in life...

A great pleasure in life - is doing what people say you cannot do
Rating: 61
2Comments

I don't miss him. ...

I don't miss him. - I miss the perfect version of him I have in my mind
Rating: 74
2Comments

Believe in what you do...

Believe in what you do - And the word "impossible" will disappear from your life
Rating: 67
2Comments

True Women...

True Women - Bring balance to a man's life
Rating: 63
2Comments

If a Person Has Sad Eyes...

If a Person Has Sad Eyes - that means he knows something about life...
Rating: 34
2Comments

Slave ...

Slave - Looking for a slave any age to do what I say no matter what i ask
Rating: 4
1Comments

Life...

Life - goals
Rating: 39
1Comments

USA did nothing...

USA did nothing - USA did nothing to safe Jews from death in extermination camps in Poland
Rating: 4
1Comments

Men's life...

Men's life - is much easier
Rating: 30
1Comments

If you think life is hard...

If you think life is hard - You have never played this mission
Rating: 24
1Comments

3 biggest tragedies in a mans life......

3 biggest tragedies in a mans life... - Life sucks, job sucks, and the wife dowsn't!
Rating: 34
1Comments

Mysterious floating things on my vision...

Mysterious floating things on my vision - Biggest mystery of my life
Rating: 39
1Comments

Quiero crear en tí pero la vida me ha enseñado...

Quiero crear en tí pero la vida me ha enseñado - que tengo que dudar aunque mí alma duele en pensar de su traición..
Rating: 5
1Comments

I'd rather look back at my life and say...

I'd rather look back at my life and say - "I can't believe I did that" instead of saying "I wish I did that"...
Rating: 28
1Comments

Some of the best moments in life...

Some of the best moments in life - Are the ones you can't tell anyone about
Rating: 31
1Comments

I AM...

I AM - imperfection perfected
Rating: 30
1Comments

IT TAKES 250,001 TO SCREW IN A LIGHTBULB...

IT TAKES 250,001 TO SCREW IN A LIGHTBULB - 1 to do it..and 250,000 to debate if it was politically correct
Rating: 26
1Comments

FUCK IT, EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE OK...

FUCK IT, EVERYTHING'S GOING TO BE OK - and if it's not, well... fuck it anyway!
Rating: 35
1Comments

NEVER STOP...

NEVER STOP - being fashionable
Rating: 21
1Comments

THE ENTIRE FRENCH LANGUAGE...

THE ENTIRE FRENCH LANGUAGE - is a choking hazard
Rating: 25
1Comments

CONSIDERING I'M BROKE...

CONSIDERING I'M BROKE - I wonder if she’ll let me be her sugar-free daddy
Rating: 31
1Comments

WHOEVER NAMED IT 'RAIN' IS AN IDIOT...

WHOEVER NAMED IT 'RAIN' IS AN IDIOT - I definitely would’ve called it ‘sky water.’
Rating: 47
1Comments

THERE ARE COUCH NAPS AND BED NAPS...

THERE ARE COUCH NAPS AND BED NAPS - Bed naps are serious
Rating: 37
1Comments

I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE...

I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE - who can’t make fun of themselves. It just makes more work for me
Rating: 40
1Comments

I REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME...

I REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME - before Facebook, when I went outside and did crap
Rating: 41
1Comments

IF YOUR PASSWORD IS YOUR NAME...

IF YOUR PASSWORD IS YOUR NAME - you deserve to be hacked
Rating: 32
1Comments

PEOPLE CRY...

PEOPLE CRY - not because they’re weak, but because they have been strong for too long
Rating: 33
1Comments

SEEING A SPIDER IS NOTHING...

SEEING A SPIDER IS NOTHING - It becomes a problem when it disappears
Rating: 44
1Comments

I-PAD, I-PHONE, I-POD, I-TAB......

I-PAD, I-PHONE, I-POD, I-TAB... - and finally i-bankrupt
Rating: 47
1Comments

I DIDN'T FIGHT MY WAY...

I DIDN'T FIGHT MY WAY - to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
Rating: 31
1Comments

THE BEST WAY TO COMBAT CRIMINALS...

THE BEST WAY TO COMBAT CRIMINALS - is by not voting for them
Rating: 40
1Comments

DON'T INSULT...

DON'T INSULT - my intelligense
Rating: 43
1Comments

BEFORE FACEBOOK...

BEFORE FACEBOOK - I had told maybe six people “Happy Birthday,” ever
Rating: 29
1Comments

I'M PRETTY SURE...

I'M PRETTY SURE - Internet Explorer "error reports” end up the same place my letters to Santa do
Rating: 44
1Comments

THE REASON WOMEN ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS...

THE REASON WOMEN ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS - is because they have an extra why chromosome
Rating: 43
1Comments

LIFE'S ALL ABOUT BUTTS. YOU ARE EITHER COVERING IT...

LIFE'S ALL ABOUT BUTTS. YOU ARE EITHER COVERING IT - laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it
Rating: 27
1Comments

I HAVE ABOUT 48535457956 APPS IN MY PHONE...

I HAVE ABOUT 48535457956 APPS IN MY PHONE - and use about 3 of them
Rating: 40
1Comments

LIFE IS SOOO MUCH FUNNIER...

LIFE IS SOOO MUCH FUNNIER - when you have a dirty mind
Rating: 38
1Comments

FACEBOOK...

FACEBOOK - needs the following 3 buttons: “Dislike”, “Who cares?”, “Are you stupid?”
Rating: 26
1Comments

IF YOU THINK PAPER BEATS ROCK...

IF YOU THINK PAPER BEATS ROCK - please hold this piece of paper in front of your face for a second
Rating: 34
1Comments

LOL, LMAO, LMFAO...

LOL, LMAO, LMFAO -
Rating: 30
1Comments

I'M NOT FAT...

I'M NOT FAT - My stomach is just 3D
Rating: 30
1Comments

IF "PLAN A" DIDN'T WORK...

IF "PLAN A" DIDN'T WORK - the alphabet has 25 more letters. Stay Cool.
Rating: 36
1Comments

HOW TO GET A SOCIAL LIFE...

HOW TO GET A SOCIAL LIFE - 1. Unplug your WiFi router.2. Go outside.
Rating: 22
1Comments

GUYS:...

GUYS: - Wow, her status is dumb, but she’s cute, so I’m going to like it.
Rating: 38
1Comments

IF YOU HAVE SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE WHO LAUGHS...

IF YOU HAVE SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE WHO LAUGHS - at the same crap you do, no matter how messed up it is, they are your soul mate
Rating: 30
1Comments

GUYS, YOU'D HAVE A BETTER CHANCE OF BEING...

GUYS, YOU'D HAVE A BETTER CHANCE OF BEING - shirtless in a woman’s bedroom if you weren’t shirtless in your Facebook photo
Rating: 46
1Comments

A LIFE!?...

A LIFE!? - Where can I download one of those?
Rating: 36
1Comments

OLD PEOPLE + TECHNOLOGY =...

OLD PEOPLE + TECHNOLOGY = - Funny
Rating: 48
1Comments

WHY ISN'T "CHEATING"...

WHY ISN'T "CHEATING" - a relationship status on Facebook?
Rating: 40
1Comments

IF YOU RAN LIKE YOUR MOUTH...

IF YOU RAN LIKE YOUR MOUTH - you’d be in amazing shape
Rating: 22
1Comments

I DON'T KNOW...

I DON'T KNOW - what I did before the internet
Rating: 38
1Comments

FACT:...

FACT: - Your number of real friends is about 2% of all your Facebook friends
Rating: 23
1Comments

LIFE IS NOT ABOUT HOW FAST YOU RUN...

LIFE IS NOT ABOUT HOW FAST YOU RUN - or how high you climb, but how well you bounce
Rating: 42
1Comments

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING HIGH STANDARTS...

NEVER APOLOGIZE FOR HAVING HIGH STANDARTS - Because people, who want to stay in your life, will CLIMB OVER those standarts
Rating: 50
1Comments

MY SHOWER ONLY HAS TWO OPTIONS...

MY SHOWER ONLY HAS TWO OPTIONS - 3rd degree burns or skinny dipping in Antarctica
Rating: 21
1Comments

YOU KNOW YOU'RE DESPERATE FOR AN ANSWER...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE DESPERATE FOR AN ANSWER - when you look on the second page of Google
Rating: 23
1Comments

THE STRONGEST DRUG THAT EXISTS FOR A HUMAN...

THE STRONGEST DRUG THAT EXISTS FOR A HUMAN - is another human being
Rating: 43
1Comments

THAT MINI HEART ATTACK...

THAT MINI HEART ATTACK - When you send a text to the wrong person
Rating: 30
1Comments

I'M SO OLD...

I'M SO OLD - I remember when people used to talk on cord phones
Rating: 44
1Comments

THE BEST AND THE WORST THING ABOUT INTERNET...

THE BEST AND THE WORST THING ABOUT INTERNET - It’s available to everyone
Rating: 25
1Comments

BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE AND UGLY PEOPLE...

BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE AND UGLY PEOPLE - Basically look the same by 80. So hang in there, uglies
Rating: 29
1Comments

I NEVER MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE...

I NEVER MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE - I make it like five or six times, you know, just to be sure
Rating: 25
1Comments

SCIENCE...

SCIENCE - Ruining everything since 1543
Rating: 26
1Comments

TEACHERS CALL IT CHEATING...

TEACHERS CALL IT CHEATING - We call it teamwork
Rating: 21
1Comments

NETWORK ADMINS...

NETWORK ADMINS - We may be strange, but we know what you surf for during lunch
Rating: 44
1Comments

INTELLIGENCE...

INTELLIGENCE - Beats size
Rating: 39
1Comments

YOUR FORTUNE...

YOUR FORTUNE - Is in your own hands. Deal with it
Rating: 38
1Comments

SAVE COWS!...

SAVE COWS! - Eat vegetarians
Rating: 28
1Comments

CHUPACABRA...

CHUPACABRA - Real life version.
Rating: 32
1Comments

SOMEHOW IT MAKES YOU FEEL A BIT UNCOMFORTABLE...

SOMEHOW IT MAKES YOU FEEL A BIT UNCOMFORTABLE - Knowing these pictures are rare because of our kind.
Rating: 32
1Comments

THE HARDEST THING IN LIFE...

THE HARDEST THING IN LIFE - is to control yourself when you want to laugh badly.
Rating: 37
1Comments

WORLD WITHOUT WOMEN...

WORLD WITHOUT WOMEN - is a world without life. Video: WORLD WITHOUT WOMEN - is a world without life.
Rating: 26
1Comments

IT'S NOT ABOUT LIFE...

IT'S NOT ABOUT LIFE - It's about us.
Rating: 32
1Comments

LIFE...

LIFE - Why everything has to be that difficult?
Rating: 35
1Comments

LIFE NEVER GETS EASIER...

LIFE NEVER GETS EASIER - It's you, who become stronger.
Rating: 34
1Comments

MARRIAGE - IS WHEN YOU FIND A SPECIAL PERSON...

MARRIAGE - IS WHEN YOU FIND A SPECIAL PERSON - Who you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
Rating: 34
1Comments

IT LIVES ONLY FOR 4 WEEKS...

IT LIVES ONLY FOR 4 WEEKS - But it dedicates all it's life to piss you off
Rating: 35
1Comments

THERE ARE SO MANY BEAUTIFUL PLACES IN THIS WORLD...

THERE ARE SO MANY BEAUTIFUL PLACES IN THIS WORLD - And only one life to see them all
Rating: 26
1Comments

When I hear people saying "Life is hard"...

When I hear people saying "Life is hard" - I always want to ask "Compared to what?"
Rating: 42
1Comments

You speak behind my back?...

You speak behind my back? - It means my life is much more interesting than yours.
Rating: 42
1Comments

The real face...

The real face - of modern life
Rating: 31
1Comments

- Hi, can I buy you a cup of coffee?...

- Hi, can I buy you a cup of coffee? - - No, you look like a good person, I don't want to ruin your life...
Rating: 51
1Comments

Life is like a box of chocolate candies...

Life is like a box of chocolate candies - Quite expensive and not enough
Rating: 30
1Comments

The last words...

The last words - in any persons life
Rating: 38
1Comments

We Should.....

We Should.. - We Should.. - Spend Our Lifes Together
Rating: 2
1Comments

Life...

Life - Is the longest and the most painful way to die
Rating: 41
1Comments

In three words I can sum up everything...

In three words I can sum up everything - I've learned about life: "It goes on.”
Rating: 35
1Comments

It is sad, that people...

It is sad, that people - Who doesn't appreciate life can't give it to someone who really wants to live
Rating: 35
1Comments

Just a little bit of love...

Just a little bit of love - Can bring to a new life
Rating: 38
1Comments

Life is the biggest sadist...

Life is the biggest sadist - It gives you desires, but doesn't give opportunity
Rating: 56
1Comments

Truth...

Truth -
Rating: 54
1Comments

Math and logic...

Math and logic - two things, that can help make your life much better
Rating: 50
1Comments

Shoes can change your life...

Shoes can change your life - You don't believe it? Ask Cinderella.
Rating: 28
1Comments

1 Cigarette ...

1 Cigarette - swallows 7 minutes of your life.
Rating: 48
1Comments

Life...

Life - is a struggle
Rating: 45
1Comments

Weed...

Weed - Makes life stranger
Rating: 124
1Comments

Life's too short...

Life's too short - For the wrong job
Rating: 50
1Comments

Daddy,...

Daddy, - Tell me about your life.. Video: Daddy, - Tell me about your life..
Rating: 40
1Comments

When we wake up in the morning we have two choices...

When we wake up in the morning we have two choices - Go back to sleep and dream, or wake up and chase those dreams
Rating: 31
1Comments

One of the hardest things in life...

One of the hardest things in life - is watching someone you love, loving someone else
Rating: 74
1Comments

Life is short...

Life is short - Not enough time to ruin it for everyone
Rating: 43
1Comments

Spiderman...

Spiderman - What really happened
Rating: 42
1Comments

Technology...

Technology - Destroys lifes
Rating: 90
1Comments

Pokemon...

Pokemon - In real life
Rating: 64
1Comments

While waiting for a miracle,...

While waiting for a miracle, - you'll miss your life
Rating: 51
1Comments

Opportunities to find deeper powers ...

Opportunities to find deeper powers - within ourselves come when life seems most challenging
Rating: 1
1Comments

If you're brave to say goodbye...

If you're brave to say goodbye - life will reward you with a new "hello"
Rating: 64
1Comments

School...

School - We're learning not for school, but for life
Rating: 2
1Comments

Loneliness...

Loneliness - When people you love are happy without you
Rating: 40
1Comments

Life...

Life - Is so fucking hard
Rating: 68
1Comments

Everything will be okay in the end....

Everything will be okay in the end. - If it's not okay, it's not the end.
Rating: 89
1Comments

Mirror ...

Mirror - This is what you look like right now
Rating: 77
1Comments

Throw him to the street...

Throw him to the street - And you'll remember those eyes for the whole life
Rating: 26
1Comments

Sometimes people cry....

Sometimes people cry. - Not because they're weak, it's because they've been strong for too long.
Rating: 89
1Comments

Life is like a piano. ...

Life is like a piano. - What you get out of it depends on how you play it.
Rating: 46
1Comments

SOMETIMES...

SOMETIMES - You gotta accept things the way they are.
Rating: 5
1Comments

The Irony of Life...

The Irony of Life -
Rating: 30
1Comments

Life is a cruel teacher....

Life is a cruel teacher. - Firstly it gives you a test and only then the lesson
Rating: 54
1Comments

Adrenaline...

Adrenaline - The engine of life
Rating: 21
1Comments

4 beds...

4 beds - of our life
Rating: 30
1Comments

Suddenly...

Suddenly - I am not half the man I used to be
Rating: 57
1Comments

Meanwhile...

Meanwhile - In America...
Rating: 49
1Comments

Life...

Life - the battlefield from which no one comes back alive
Rating: 59
1Comments

Tell Him...

Tell Him - that your life is monotonious and doesn't make any sense...
Rating: 42
1Comments

The Wish Of A Modern Man...

The Wish Of A Modern Man - unfortunately it's already too late...
Rating: 31
1Comments

The Worst Cheat...

The Worst Cheat - is to promise to love someone for a lifetime
Rating: 32
1Comments

Woman...

Woman - You feel good and enjoy your life, but only until you engage...
Rating: 0
1Comments

Life Is Full...

Life Is Full - of hard choices
Rating: 43
1Comments

If Life Is Giving You A Surprise...

If Life Is Giving You A Surprise - better be prepared to take full advantage of this chance
Rating: 55
1Comments

The Hardest Thing In Life...

The Hardest Thing In Life - is to watch the one you love, love someone else
Rating: 56
1Comments

Don't Trust Species That Are Always Smiling...

Don't Trust Species That Are Always Smiling - it's up to something
Rating: 23
1Comments

Life...

Life - is fucking hard
Rating: 48
1Comments

Life is Beautiful...

Life is Beautiful - .. if you choose the right medicine...
Rating: 30
1Comments

510 072 000 square meters...

510 072 000 square meters - and it's still difficult to find the right place to be
Rating: 27
1Comments

Justus3...

Justus3 - Serious inquiries only. Please leave your email.
Rating: 0
0Comments

Justus3...

Justus3 - Serious inquiries only. Please leave your email.
Rating: 2
0Comments

Justus3...

Justus3 - Lifestyle
Rating: 1
0Comments

Justus3...

Justus3 - Lifestyle
Rating: 2
0Comments

Road of Life...

Road of Life - Don't prepare the way for your children, prepare your children for it
Rating: 3
0Comments

Very short doc about suicide...

Very short doc about suicide - Video: Very short doc about suicide -
Rating: 0
0Comments

Lifehack #1...

Lifehack #1 - Video: Lifehack #1 -
Rating: 1
0Comments

Slave ...

Slave - Looking for a slave any age to do what I say no matter what i ask
Rating: 4
0Comments

Me and my problems...

Me and my problems - Everytime I am struggling with my problems. Video: Me and my problems - Everytime I am struggling with my problems.
Rating: 4
0Comments

oh....... im late...........!!!!!!!!!!...

oh....... im late...........!!!!!!!!!! - Video: oh....... im late...........!!!!!!!!!! -
Rating: 0
0Comments

cat from shrek in real life...

cat from shrek in real life - Video: cat from shrek in real life -
Rating: 0
0Comments

CRASH is CLOSE...

CRASH is CLOSE - Video: CRASH is CLOSE -
Rating: 1
0Comments

Grand Theft Auto (in real life) - Kursk Ci...

Grand Theft Auto (in real life) - Kursk Ci - Video: Grand Theft Auto (in real life) - Kursk Ci -
Rating: 2
0Comments

Daily help needed...

Daily help needed - Stop and help Video: Daily help needed - Stop and help
Rating: 1
0Comments

4 of the greatest dangers of married life...

4 of the greatest dangers of married life - Video: 4 of the greatest dangers of married life -
Rating: 0
0Comments

Drive carefully...

Drive carefully - Save youself and others Video: Drive carefully - Save youself and others
Rating: 0
0Comments

Countryside!...

Countryside! - Enjoying the little things in life
Rating: 4
0Comments

Dreaming...

Dreaming - Whatta life!
Rating: 5
0Comments

Leslie Nielse- Thug Life & WASTED...

Leslie Nielse- Thug Life & WASTED - Video: Leslie Nielse- Thug Life & WASTED -
Rating: 3
0Comments

Call me crazy but i love to see people happy...

Call me crazy but i love to see people happy - and succeeding. Life is a journey, not a competetion
Rating: 3
0Comments

Pursuit of happiness...

Pursuit of happiness - To have agood job is a must to live,however the real life is doing what you love
Rating: 2
0Comments

Life...

Life - is game
Rating: 23
0Comments

Pull your head out of your ass......

Pull your head out of your ass... - life won't be so shitty.
Rating: 24
0Comments

I wish my life had background music...

I wish my life had background music - so I could understand what the hell is going on
Rating: 39
0Comments

How to ...

How to - enjpy the life
Rating: 41
0Comments

Students...

Students - life
Rating: 32
0Comments

15 minutes...

15 minutes - of women's life
Rating: 26
0Comments

Life's too short to worry...

Life's too short to worry - about matching socks
Rating: 43
0Comments

Acid...

Acid - definitely will make you insane
Rating: 5
0Comments

Success...

Success - in different stages of your life
Rating: 30
0Comments

The last thing he did...

The last thing he did - in his life
Rating: 32
0Comments

Half Life 3...

Half Life 3 - secret
Rating: 28
0Comments

Donald Trump's hair finally...

Donald Trump's hair finally - runs off to seek a better life...
Rating: 25
0Comments

It's official! The creators of the Simpsons are...

It's official! The creators of the Simpsons are - from the future and just created the TV show to live a great life!
Rating: 35
0Comments

Dog is love...

Dog is love - dog is life
Rating: 29
0Comments

I would rather walk...

I would rather walk - with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light
Rating: 2
0Comments

I thought alligators just float on the water......

I thought alligators just float on the water... - My whole life has been a lie!
Rating: 45
0Comments

Everyone...

Everyone - have it's own life
Rating: 45
0Comments

It was...

It was - the worst day in her life
Rating: 50
0Comments

That awkward moment...

That awkward moment - When deer have a better life than you
Rating: 23
0Comments

If you woke up without a goal...

If you woke up without a goal - Go back to sleep
Rating: 47
0Comments

The worst 45 seconds...

The worst 45 seconds - On your life
Rating: 44
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 8
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 7
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 9
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... Не важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... He важно сколько дней в твоей жизни,...

... He важно сколько дней в твоей жизни, - важно сколько жизни в твоих днях... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 5
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 1
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 0
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 3
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 7
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... © (RC) Ross Carter 2005
Rating: 2
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... (RC)
Rating: 4
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days... (RC)
Rating: 0
0Comments

Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, - it matters how much life is in your days (RC
Rating: 6
0Comments

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life,...

... Doesn't matter how many days are in your life, -
Rating: 4
0Comments

Me...

Me - Trying to handle life
Rating: 25
0Comments

My life...

My life - in one picture
Rating: 25
0Comments

The first eighteen years of your life are like...

The first eighteen years of your life are like - a free trial, and after that it's pay to play
Rating: 20
0Comments

When you are having good time...

When you are having good time - then you start thinking about life
Rating: 24
0Comments

Smurfs...

Smurfs - In real life
Rating: 3
0Comments

Thug life...

Thug life - Crow edition
Rating: 29
0Comments

It's called UNO...

It's called UNO - because after you're done playing you'll be alone for the rest of your life....
Rating: 23
0Comments

My friend works at a animal hospital...

My friend works at a animal hospital - I need this type of job in my life
Rating: 46
0Comments

Story of my life....

Story of my life. -
Rating: 39
0Comments

Facebook photo and real life...

Facebook photo and real life -
Rating: 35
0Comments

Life...

Life - of the most people
Rating: 34
0Comments

We're not born...

We're not born - Just to pay bills
Rating: 30
0Comments

Sometimes...

Sometimes - life is harder than imagined.
Rating: 52
0Comments

Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all dogs...

Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all dogs - that were excited for the car ride until we realized where we're going
Rating: 38
0Comments

Life goals:...

Life goals: - girls vs boys
Rating: 24
0Comments

Life...

Life - in Dubai
Rating: 35
0Comments

My...

My - life in 1 photo
Rating: 28
0Comments

Every morning...

Every morning - Of my life
Rating: 50
0Comments

Real life?...

Real life? - What are the minimum requirements?
Rating: 21
0Comments

Truth...

Truth - of life
Rating: 28
0Comments

Instagram Real life...

Instagram Real life -
Rating: 37
0Comments

Life...

Life - goals
Rating: 23
0Comments

Life...

Life - Of a college student
Rating: 36
0Comments

My life...

My life -
Rating: 37
0Comments

Life...

Life - Is unfair...
Rating: 30
0Comments

When life is hard...

When life is hard - but you try to be healthly
Rating: 25
0Comments

GTA in real life...

GTA in real life - Man imagines that he is in a computer game Video: GTA in real life - Man imagines that he is in a computer game
Rating: 0
0Comments

Life is like a penis...

Life is like a penis - Simple, soft, straight, relaxed and hanging freely. Then women make it hard.
Rating: 49
0Comments

Never take life seriously...

Never take life seriously - Nobody gets out alive anyway
Rating: 35
0Comments

He might be only part of your life, for him,...

He might be only part of your life, for him, - you are his everything, the only person in his whole life
Rating: 33
0Comments

When your friends...

When your friends - take your phone and get your password
Rating: 2
0Comments

If a friendship lasts longer than 7 years...

If a friendship lasts longer than 7 years - Psychologists say it will last a lifetime
Rating: 27
0Comments

Life...

Life - without internet
Rating: 43
0Comments

Your life...

Your life - after installing Instagram
Rating: 21
0Comments

Water is the most essential element of life...

Water is the most essential element of life - Because without water, you can't make coffee
Rating: 27
0Comments

Ctrl + z...

Ctrl + z - does'nt work in real life
Rating: 48
0Comments

My life goal is to find a girl...

My life goal is to find a girl - That would take this over a diamond ring
Rating: 33
0Comments

A life decision...

A life decision - Was made here
Rating: 56
0Comments

My life...

My life - In a picture
Rating: 34
0Comments

My life...

My life - In one picture
Rating: 22
0Comments

Life without women...

Life without women - Would be a pain in the ass
Rating: 54
0Comments

A woman with a beautiful body is good for a night...

A woman with a beautiful body is good for a night - But a woman with a beautiful mind is good for a lifetime
Rating: 22
0Comments

The real life...

The real life - Peter Griffin
Rating: 26
0Comments

TYPO...

TYPO - too late.
Rating: 2
0Comments

You life...

You life - when you playing poker
Rating: 28
0Comments

Bottles...

Bottles - of life
Rating: 21
0Comments

Eat right. Stay fit....

Eat right. Stay fit. - Die anyway.
Rating: 54
0Comments

That moment when...

That moment when - Candy has a better love life than you
Rating: 29
0Comments

Perfect...

Perfect - lifehack
Rating: 40
0Comments

My love life...

My love life - In a nutshell...
Rating: 29
0Comments

Chocolate is love...

Chocolate is love - Chocolate is life
Rating: 34
0Comments

My life...

My life - and I do what I want!
Rating: 23
0Comments

Dear girls: If a guy wants you to learn how to...

Dear girls: If a guy wants you to learn how to - Play a game, it means you're the most important person in his life
Rating: 33
0Comments

No matter what happens in your life...

No matter what happens in your life - You will never be this happy
Rating: 27
0Comments

Immature...

Immature - A word boring people use to describe fun people
Rating: 43
0Comments

If there are no ups and downs in your life...

If there are no ups and downs in your life - It means you are dead
Rating: 27
0Comments

Life is not a fairy tale...

Life is not a fairy tale - If you lose a shoe at midnight, you're drunk as sh*t!
Rating: 30
0Comments

Whatever you do in this life...

Whatever you do in this life - It's not legendary unless your friends are there to see it
Rating: 34
0Comments

My student life...

My student life - In one sentence
Rating: 24
0Comments

This could be us...

This could be us - But we're poor
Rating: 34
0Comments

Mario and Peach...

Mario and Peach - The later years
Rating: 41
0Comments

It's not who you wanna spend your life with...

It's not who you wanna spend your life with - It's who you dont wanna spend your life without
Rating: 29
0Comments

Life is like math...

Life is like math - If it goes too easy, something is wrong
Rating: 32
0Comments

When life brings you lemons...

When life brings you lemons - you make lemonade with hot girls and billionaire by your side
Rating: 50
0Comments

My whole life...

My whole life - Is one big lie
Rating: 32
0Comments

Story of my life......

Story of my life... -
Rating: 31
0Comments

Life...

Life - after studies simulator
Rating: 24
0Comments

I've been doing it wrong...

I've been doing it wrong - my entire life
Rating: 36
0Comments

Pizza is love...

Pizza is love - Pizza is life
Rating: 30
0Comments

Birthdays are good for your health...

Birthdays are good for your health - Studies have shown that people who have more birthdays live longer
Rating: 37
0Comments

Key...

Key - for the another life
Rating: 20
0Comments

The graphics in FIFA 15...

The graphics in FIFA 15 - Are so lifelike!
Rating: 35
0Comments

Smileys...

Smileys - in real life
Rating: 30
0Comments

I tried to be normal once...

I tried to be normal once - Worst two minutes of my life
Rating: 56
0Comments

The best things...

The best things - in life are free
Rating: 35
0Comments

Life is not a fairy tale...

Life is not a fairy tale - If you lose your shoe at midnight, you're drunk.
Rating: 40
0Comments

When you think life is fair...

When you think life is fair - You discover Dan Bilzerian...
Rating: 21
0Comments

Life...

Life - after the wedding
Rating: 41
0Comments

The world is going to judge you no matter what you...

The world is going to judge you no matter what you - do, so live your life the way you fu*king want to.
Rating: 42
0Comments

Problems in your life...

Problems in your life - makes whisky more tasty
Rating: 33
0Comments

If you take my sweet...

If you take my sweet - I'll take your life
Rating: 33
0Comments

This baby is 7 minutes old...

This baby is 7 minutes old - And is already fed up with life
Rating: 38
0Comments

Every man...

Every man - do this at least once in his life
Rating: 27
0Comments

3 rules...

3 rules - Of successful life
Rating: 45
0Comments

If you take my candy...

If you take my candy - I take your life
Rating: 33
0Comments

Double the battery life of an iPhone...

Double the battery life of an iPhone - By putting the fucking thing down!
Rating: 41
0Comments

Maturity comes when you stop...

Maturity comes when you stop - Publishing every detail of your life on social media
Rating: 34
0Comments

My life...

My life - so far...
Rating: 33
0Comments

Some of the best moments in life are the ones...

Some of the best moments in life are the ones - You can't tell anyone about
Rating: 29
0Comments

Lifehack how to get more likes...

Lifehack how to get more likes - for girls
Rating: 33
0Comments

Single is not a status. It describes a persone who...

Single is not a status. It describes a persone who - is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others.
Rating: 41
0Comments

Difference of a man's life...

Difference of a man's life - With and without girlfriend
Rating: 42
0Comments

When life puts you in touh situations...

When life puts you in touh situations - Don't say "WHY ME?", say "TRY ME!"
Rating: 49
0Comments

All life...

All life - in one photo
Rating: 38
0Comments

Life...

Life - of modern people
Rating: 32
0Comments

This summarizes my love life...

This summarizes my love life - I'm the guy in blue
Rating: 38
0Comments

If you don't have friend like this...

If you don't have friend like this - Your life is boring
Rating: 37
0Comments

A woman with a beautiful body is good for a night...

A woman with a beautiful body is good for a night - But a woman witg a beatiful mind is good for a lifetime
Rating: 30
0Comments

Don't take life so seriously...

Don't take life so seriously - It's not like you're going to get out alive
Rating: 24
0Comments

Wheels of life......

Wheels of life... -
Rating: 34
0Comments

REMEMBER...

REMEMBER - eat them all!
Rating: 8
0Comments

When life throws you a banana…...

When life throws you a banana… -
Rating: 21
0Comments

Different lifes...

Different lifes - One way.
Rating: 21
0Comments

Characters...

Characters - Of game called - life.
Rating: 30
0Comments

Honked at an Audi, and scared the shit out of it....

Honked at an Audi, and scared the shit out of it. -
Rating: 0
0Comments

That awkward moment in your life...

That awkward moment in your life - When kids start calling you "Uncle"
Rating: 22
0Comments

All my life...

All my life - O've been lied to
Rating: 33
0Comments

Longest 10 seconds...

Longest 10 seconds - Of your life
Rating: 40
0Comments

Prepared...

Prepared - For life
Rating: 40
0Comments

Got Shaft's Bitch...

Got Shaft's Bitch - Salt Life
Rating: 8
0Comments

Money or life!...

Money or life! - Money AND life!
Rating: 42
0Comments

Life is full of fake people...

Life is full of fake people - Trust no one
Rating: 29
0Comments

Don't pray for an easy life...

Don't pray for an easy life - prey for the strength to endure difficult one
Rating: 3
0Comments

Life is too short...

Life is too short - To remove USB safely
Rating: 21
0Comments

God said...

God said - He will fix this in the next patch
Rating: 32
0Comments

The truth about life...

The truth about life -
Rating: 5
0Comments

Happiness !!!...

Happiness !!! - When your plan is well
Rating: 5
0Comments

Long...

Long - life to travel !!!
Rating: 5
0Comments

Life is the art of drawing ...

Life is the art of drawing - without an eraser.
Rating: 11
0Comments

He who asks a question,...

He who asks a question, - risks looking like a fool far one minute. He who does not – far his whole life.
Rating: 4
0Comments

Life is like piano. ...

Life is like piano. - What you get out of it depends on how you play it.
Rating: 9
0Comments

When life gives you a thousand reasons to cry, ...

When life gives you a thousand reasons to cry, - show life you have a million reasons to smile.
Rating: 2
0Comments

Life is like chocolate candys in the box. ...

Life is like chocolate candys in the box. - You don't know when you'll be eaten.
Rating: 7
0Comments

Life is not about waitting for the storm to pass,...

Life is not about waitting for the storm to pass, - but it's about learning how to dance in the rain.
Rating: 3
0Comments

With bike you need 10 minutes up the hill,...

With bike you need 10 minutes up the hill, - but 10 seconds down the hill. And that's how life is.
Rating: 10
0Comments

If life was easy ......

If life was easy ... - Where would all the adventures be?
Rating: 0
0Comments

Meanwhile in the...

Meanwhile in the - Life of the man with the smallest penis...
Rating: 37
0Comments

When life...

When life - Is sh*t.
Rating: 28
0Comments

Don't take life so seriously...

Don't take life so seriously - It's not like you're going to get out alive
Rating: 27
0Comments

A negative mind...

A negative mind - will never give you a positive life
Rating: 5
0Comments

The story...

The story - Of everyone's life.
Rating: 45
0Comments

The purpose of life is...

The purpose of life is - Leave something good after you... Video: The purpose of life is - Leave something good after you...
Rating: 38
0Comments

Man's...

Man's - Life...
Rating: 43
0Comments

Life is too short...

Life is too short - To waste time matching socks.
Rating: 36
0Comments

Love...

Love - as it really is
Rating: 1
0Comments

Life...

Life - is too short to wait
Rating: 5
0Comments

Everything I have believed in my life...

Everything I have believed in my life - IS LIE!
Rating: 25
0Comments

We want Anubis Season 4...

We want Anubis Season 4 - Because our life makes no sence without it... Duh...
Rating: 3
0Comments

When life hands you lemons...

When life hands you lemons - Make awesome Halloween costumes
Rating: 22
0Comments

I sleep less - I'm tired....

I sleep less - I'm tired. - I sleep more - I'm tired. Life is impossible.
Rating: 30
0Comments

Live life...

Live life - play volleyball
Rating: 1
0Comments

Tell me again...

Tell me again - How hard your life is
Rating: 41
0Comments

At school......

At school... - I risk my phone's life to text you.
Rating: 32
0Comments

Adult life:...

Adult life: - If you're not tired, you're doing it wrong
Rating: 38
0Comments

True story of our lifes...

True story of our lifes - We love those, who don't want us and we don't want those, who love us
Rating: 2
0Comments

Life is to short...

Life is to short - To drink tea during our meetings...
Rating: 41
0Comments

Improve your iPhone battery life...

Improve your iPhone battery life -
Rating: 30
0Comments

The hardest moments in life...

The hardest moments in life - are when you're forced to say goodbye to someone you love
Rating: 0
0Comments

When life gives you lemons...

When life gives you lemons - It's time to do tequila shots
Rating: 26
0Comments

People wait all week for friday...

People wait all week for friday - All year for summer, all life for happiness
Rating: 33
0Comments

Your coment can kill....

Your coment can kill. - thing Video: Your coment can kill. - thing
Rating: 19
0Comments

Conmigo quien quiera ...

Conmigo quien quiera - "Contra mi quien pueda" GC
Rating: 2
0Comments

Life is so short...

Life is so short - Just do what the fuck makes you happy
Rating: 20
0Comments

Looking back over a lifetime...

Looking back over a lifetime - you see that love was the answer fot everything
Rating: 3
0Comments

Sometimes only in those moments...

Sometimes only in those moments - People understand how valuable is life...
Rating: 40
0Comments

This is why...

This is why - Women live longer
Rating: 30
0Comments

You'll never meet SpiderMan in real life...

You'll never meet SpiderMan in real life - However you can meet sh*t-man...
Rating: 49
0Comments

LIVE AND PURSUE YOUR GOALS...

LIVE AND PURSUE YOUR GOALS - so you could fuck the life and not vice versa
Rating: 22
0Comments

IF A GIRL COMPLIMENTS YOUR DRESS...

IF A GIRL COMPLIMENTS YOUR DRESS - then you’re wearing a pretty dress
Rating: 45
0Comments

LIVING ALONE...

LIVING ALONE - means never having to close the bathroom door
Rating: 21
0Comments

THE ONE THING...

THE ONE THING - you can always count on is your fingers
Rating: 22
0Comments

I HATE MOSQUITOES...

I HATE MOSQUITOES - I mean I know I’m delicious but damn
Rating: 28
0Comments

EVERYBODY HAS A SHOEBOX...

EVERYBODY HAS A SHOEBOX - hidden somewhere filled with old pictures and love letters
Rating: 34
0Comments

THEY SAY THAT YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT...

THEY SAY THAT YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT - This means that I am cheap, easy and ready in 2 minutes!
Rating: 39
0Comments

IT SHOULD BE NAMED...

IT SHOULD BE NAMED - as LOSS Vegas
Rating: 46
0Comments

I FOUND THE KEY TO SUCCESS...

I FOUND THE KEY TO SUCCESS - only to discover that the door was never locked
Rating: 47
0Comments

PEOPLE WITH 1 SYLLABLE...

PEOPLE WITH 1 SYLLABLE - names ruin the happy birthday song
Rating: 26
0Comments

I LIKE FOOD AND SLEEP...

I LIKE FOOD AND SLEEP - If I give you my food or text you all night, you’re special to me
Rating: 30
0Comments

I'M AMAZED...

I'M AMAZED - by how quickly I forget what I’m doing
Rating: 23
0Comments

THE AWKWARD MOMENT...

THE AWKWARD MOMENT - when you accidentally make eye contact with the same person like 5 times
Rating: 31
0Comments

CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER...

CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER - or do you just want the 8 dollars for the drink?
Rating: 28
0Comments

I'M JUST ONE STEP AWAY...

I'M JUST ONE STEP AWAY - from taking another step
Rating: 34
0Comments

NETFLIX...

NETFLIX - is like meth for people who hate doing things
Rating: 25
0Comments

KILL THEM WITH SUCCESS...

KILL THEM WITH SUCCESS - and bury them with a smile
Rating: 34
0Comments

I'M NOT GOING BALD...

I'M NOT GOING BALD - I’m getting more head
Rating: 33
0Comments

WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS...

WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS - If you won’t sing in the car with me when we drive
Rating: 30
0Comments

IT'S ALMOST AUGUST...

IT'S ALMOST AUGUST - and I’ve accomplished nothing
Rating: 28
0Comments

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT FINDING YOURSELF...

LIFE ISN'T ABOUT FINDING YOURSELF - it’s about creating yourself
Rating: 38
0Comments

YOU SHOULD SPEND YOUR LIFE THE WAY...

YOU SHOULD SPEND YOUR LIFE THE WAY - it would be a shameful thing to tell but a wonderful thing to remember
Rating: 27
0Comments

LIFE IS LIKE RIDING A BICYCLE...

LIFE IS LIKE RIDING A BICYCLE - to keep your balance, you must keep moving
Rating: 29
0Comments

THERE ARE LITERALLY LIKE 3 PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO...

THERE ARE LITERALLY LIKE 3 PEOPLE IN THE WORLD WHO - I can hang out with for more than four hours without wanting to strangle them
Rating: 29
0Comments

IF MY BEST FRIEND HATES YOU THEN GUESS WHAT?...

IF MY BEST FRIEND HATES YOU THEN GUESS WHAT? - I hate you too ya nasty little whore
Rating: 37
0Comments

THE IRONY OF LIFE: WIVES DON'T GET PREGNANT AFTER...

THE IRONY OF LIFE: WIVES DON'T GET PREGNANT AFTER - many attempts and girlfriends get pregnant even after taking many precautions!
Rating: 29
0Comments

PLAN A: MARRY HOT GIRL...

PLAN A: MARRY HOT GIRL - Plan B: Marry average girl that can cook Plan C: Ramen Noodles
Rating: 24
0Comments

IF YOU THINK I'M NOT GOING TO MEOW...

IF YOU THINK I'M NOT GOING TO MEOW - at a cat in front of people then you are wrong my friend
Rating: 38
0Comments

ANY GIFT...

ANY GIFT - that can’t be thrown away is really a trap
Rating: 26
0Comments

THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO IS HURT YOU...

THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO IS HURT YOU - But it’s still on the list
Rating: 21
0Comments

I ASKED GOD FOR A BIKE BUT I KNOW...

I ASKED GOD FOR A BIKE BUT I KNOW - God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness
Rating: 33
0Comments

WHY DIDN'T NOAH...

WHY DIDN'T NOAH - swat those two mosquitoes?
Rating: 41
0Comments

A BUS STATION IS WHERE A BUS STOPS....

A BUS STATION IS WHERE A BUS STOPS. - A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
Rating: 25
0Comments

EVER NEED INSPIRATION?...

EVER NEED INSPIRATION? - Listen to all the people who tell you what you CANT/WONT do
Rating: 28
0Comments

SOMETIMES I WISH...

SOMETIMES I WISH - life was more like a multiple choice test instead of essay
Rating: 26
0Comments

IF PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT...

IF PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT - and nobody’s perfect, why practice?
Rating: 24
0Comments

WELL, FUCK YOU LIFE!...

WELL, FUCK YOU LIFE! -
Rating: 28
0Comments

YOU WORRY TOO MUCH ABOUT YOUR JOB....

YOU WORRY TOO MUCH ABOUT YOUR JOB. - Stop it. You are not paid enough to worry.
Rating: 28
0Comments

I GET ENOUGH EXERCISE...

I GET ENOUGH EXERCISE - just pushing my luck!
Rating: 32
0Comments

THE FIRST HALF OF OUR LIVES...

THE FIRST HALF OF OUR LIVES - is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children
Rating: 36
0Comments

CRIME DOESN'T PAY...

CRIME DOESN'T PAY - Does that mean my job is a crime?
Rating: 35
0Comments

IMPORTANT MESSAGE...

IMPORTANT MESSAGE - Conserve your toilet paper – use both sides
Rating: 42
0Comments

PLEASE, LORD...

PLEASE, LORD - let me prove that winning the lottery won’t spoil me
Rating: 56
0Comments

SOME POEPLE'S NOSES AND FEET...

SOME POEPLE'S NOSES AND FEET - are built backwards. Their feet smell and their noses run
Rating: 29
0Comments

NO MAN GOES BEFORE HIS TIME...

NO MAN GOES BEFORE HIS TIME - Unless the boss leaves early
Rating: 34
0Comments

YOU FOUND ONE? YOU'LL HAVE HER TILL YOU'RE SMART...

YOU FOUND ONE? YOU'LL HAVE HER TILL YOU'RE SMART - You lost one? Now that's for the rest of your life...
Rating: 38
0Comments

IF YOU LEND SOMEONE $20...

IF YOU LEND SOMEONE $20 - and never see that person again; it was probably worth it.
Rating: 33
0Comments

EARTH...

EARTH - is the insane asylum for the universe
Rating: 36
0Comments

HUMANS...

HUMANS - no regard for earthlings
Rating: 36
0Comments

DON'T WORRY I WONT TELL ANYONE...

DON'T WORRY I WONT TELL ANYONE - and if I do, I’ll tell them not to tell anyone
Rating: 24
0Comments

I HAVE THE SAME BODY I'VE ALWAYS HAD...

I HAVE THE SAME BODY I'VE ALWAYS HAD - Adjusted for inflation, of course
Rating: 39
0Comments

COLLECTING MY THOUGHTS...

COLLECTING MY THOUGHTS - I almost have a whole set!
Rating: 35
0Comments

THE QUICKEST WAY TO DOUBLE YOUR MONEY...

THE QUICKEST WAY TO DOUBLE YOUR MONEY - is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
Rating: 40
0Comments

DESPITE THE COST OF LIVING...

DESPITE THE COST OF LIVING - have you noticed how popular it remains?
Rating: 28
0Comments

BE NICE TO YOUR KIDS...

BE NICE TO YOUR KIDS - They’ll choose your nursing home
Rating: 23
0Comments

ON A WALK MY SON SAW A PAY PHONE...

ON A WALK MY SON SAW A PAY PHONE - asked what it was. I made him look it up on his iPhone
Rating: 29
0Comments

MY CAT...

MY CAT - keeps disappearing and returning. I think someone else owns him too
Rating: 26
0Comments

I'VE HONESTLY NEVER SOUGHT AFTER BEAUTY...

I'VE HONESTLY NEVER SOUGHT AFTER BEAUTY - but my wife is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen
Rating: 26
0Comments

I CAN NEVER REMEMBER...

I CAN NEVER REMEMBER - whether or not I’m supposed to mess with Texas
Rating: 25
0Comments

AFTER ONE LOOK AT THIS PLANET...

AFTER ONE LOOK AT THIS PLANET - any visitor from outer space would say “I want to see the manager”
Rating: 21
0Comments

WHEN YOU GOTTA GO...

WHEN YOU GOTTA GO - you gotta go
Rating: 30
0Comments

THEY CALL ME SUPERFICIAL...

THEY CALL ME SUPERFICIAL - but I just hear “super”
Rating: 33
0Comments

WEEK: A UNITE OF TIME...

WEEK: A UNITE OF TIME - that seems so much shorter on a vacation than on a diet
Rating: 30
0Comments

INSANE...

INSANE - is only as strong as its weakest shrink
Rating: 29
0Comments

SOME PEOPLE RAKE LEAVES, OTHERS BLOW THEM...

SOME PEOPLE RAKE LEAVES, OTHERS BLOW THEM - I prefer the flamethrower, its fun for the whole neighborhood
Rating: 31
0Comments

I LIKE TO KEEP MY FRIENDS CLOSE...

I LIKE TO KEEP MY FRIENDS CLOSE - and my attractive friends even closer
Rating: 38
0Comments

LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES...

LIFE IS FULL OF SURPRISES - Just say “never” and you’ll see
Rating: 27
0Comments

I'M IN THAT AWKWARD PHASE OF THE DAY...

I'M IN THAT AWKWARD PHASE OF THE DAY - between never drinking again and noon
Rating: 32
0Comments

PHOTOSHOPPING...

PHOTOSHOPPING - You're doing it right!
Rating: 40
0Comments

WITH ALL THE TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE NOW...

WITH ALL THE TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE NOW - you’d think they’d have found a way to grow apples without those little stickers
Rating: 28
0Comments

LIFE BEFORE GOOGLE...

LIFE BEFORE GOOGLE -
Rating: 43
0Comments

NEVER LET YOUR SENSE OF MORALS...

NEVER LET YOUR SENSE OF MORALS - prevent you from doing what is right
Rating: 34
0Comments

DO IT TOMORROW...

DO IT TOMORROW - You’ve made enough mistakes for today
Rating: 30
0Comments

A PSYCHIATRIST...

A PSYCHIATRIST - is a highly paid baggage handler
Rating: 25
0Comments

I'M NOT SINGLE...

I'M NOT SINGLE - I’m romantically challenged
Rating: 42
0Comments

DON'T WORRY ABOUT AVOIDING TEMPTATION...

DON'T WORRY ABOUT AVOIDING TEMPTATION - As you grow older, it will avoid you
Rating: 24
0Comments

THE ONLY TIME I EVER NAP...

THE ONLY TIME I EVER NAP - is after hitting the snooze button. I took 32 naps this morning.
Rating: 37
0Comments

HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME...

HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME - to remember your birthday when you never look any older?
Rating: 32
0Comments

STARTING A SENTENCE WITH "IF YOU ASK ME"...

STARTING A SENTENCE WITH "IF YOU ASK ME" - almost always indicates that no one asked you
Rating: 27
0Comments

ASSUMPTION...

ASSUMPTION - the first sign of impending disaster
Rating: 32
0Comments

I'D RATHER BE LATE IN THIS WORLD...

I'D RATHER BE LATE IN THIS WORLD - than early in the next
Rating: 21
0Comments

MY WIFE SAYS...

MY WIFE SAYS - I have a way with words... the WRONG way
Rating: 25
0Comments

ONLY ME?!...

ONLY ME?! - Well... We’re in BIG trouble then!
Rating: 22
0Comments

THE SCIENTIFIC NAME FOR AN ANIMAL...

THE SCIENTIFIC NAME FOR AN ANIMAL - that doesn’t run from or fight his enemies is “lunch”
Rating: 30
0Comments

SOME PEOPLE...

SOME PEOPLE - just love fucking with other's brains
Rating: 24
0Comments

DON'T TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY...

DON'T TAKE LIFE TOO SERIOUSLY - No one gets out alive
Rating: 30
0Comments

NEVER AGREE TO PLASTIC SURGERY...

NEVER AGREE TO PLASTIC SURGERY - if the doctor’s office is full of portraits by Picasso
Rating: 37
0Comments

HATING HATE...

HATING HATE - does not mean you love love
Rating: 24
0Comments

AS LONG AS THERE ARE TESTS...

AS LONG AS THERE ARE TESTS - there will be prayer in public schools
Rating: 28
0Comments

ALWAYS SMILE...

ALWAYS SMILE - it prolongs your life, makes your friends happier and annoys your enemies
Rating: 40
0Comments

LIFE ON WHEELS...

LIFE ON WHEELS -
Rating: 45
0Comments

THE BIGGEST MISTAKE YOU CAN MAKE IN YOUR LIFE...

THE BIGGEST MISTAKE YOU CAN MAKE IN YOUR LIFE - is to be afraid of making a mistake
Rating: 27
0Comments

MOTHERS OF TEENS...

MOTHERS OF TEENS - know why some animals eat their young
Rating: 31
0Comments

NOT ALL MEN ARE FOOLS...

NOT ALL MEN ARE FOOLS - Some are Bachelors
Rating: 29
0Comments

MONEY CAN'T BUY YOU HAPPINESS...

MONEY CAN'T BUY YOU HAPPINESS - but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery
Rating: 29
0Comments

BLESSED ARE THE YOUNG...

BLESSED ARE THE YOUNG - for they shall inherit the national debt
Rating: 46
0Comments

THERE IS ALWAYS ONE MORE IMBECILE...

THERE IS ALWAYS ONE MORE IMBECILE - than you counted on
Rating: 38
0Comments

I HAVE NOT FAILED...

I HAVE NOT FAILED - I have just found ten thousand ways that will not work
Rating: 52
0Comments

WELL...

WELL - at least the war on the environment is going well
Rating: 24
0Comments

IT TAKES MONEY TO MAKE MONEY...

IT TAKES MONEY TO MAKE MONEY - because you have to copy the design exactly
Rating: 21
0Comments

BE NAUGHTY...

BE NAUGHTY - and save Santa the trip
Rating: 39
0Comments

EVERY TIME YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH...

EVERY TIME YOU OPEN YOUR MOUTH - some idiot starts talking
Rating: 51
0Comments

A LITTLE LIE IS LIKE A LITTLE PREGNANCY...

A LITTLE LIE IS LIKE A LITTLE PREGNANCY - it doesn’t take long before everyone knows
Rating: 50
0Comments

HOMEI S WHERE YOU CAN SAY ANYTHING YOU LIKE...

HOMEI S WHERE YOU CAN SAY ANYTHING YOU LIKE - ’cause nobody listens to you anyway
Rating: 23
0Comments

THE HARDEST GAME IN LIFE IS LIFE ITSELF...

THE HARDEST GAME IN LIFE IS LIFE ITSELF -
Rating: 30
0Comments

TO BE SURE OF HITTING THE TARGET...

TO BE SURE OF HITTING THE TARGET - shoot first and call whatever you hit the target
Rating: 41
0Comments

CHANG IS INEVITABLE...

CHANG IS INEVITABLE - except from a vending machine
Rating: 29
0Comments

DON'T BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS YOU...

DON'T BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS YOU - Not until you’re full anyway
Rating: 43
0Comments

YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLDER...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLDER - when happy hour is a nap
Rating: 30
0Comments

MOST OF US CAN KEEP A SECRET...

MOST OF US CAN KEEP A SECRET - It’s the people we tell it to who can’t
Rating: 27
0Comments

EAT RIGHT, EXERCISE...

EAT RIGHT, EXERCISE - die anyway
Rating: 48
0Comments

WHEN SOMEONE RINGS THE DOORBELL...

WHEN SOMEONE RINGS THE DOORBELL - why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
Rating: 42
0Comments

THE WINNER OF THE RAT RACE...

THE WINNER OF THE RAT RACE - is still a rat
Rating: 33
0Comments

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE...

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE - Move to a new town and don’t tell your relatives
Rating: 28
0Comments

LIFE'S TOO SHORT...

LIFE'S TOO SHORT - to zip your pants
Rating: 46
0Comments

IF WE CHANGE 'PROBLEM' INTO 'ADVENTURE'...

IF WE CHANGE 'PROBLEM' INTO 'ADVENTURE' - life becomes much more interesting
Rating: 28
0Comments

MARRIAGE...

MARRIAGE - is nature’s way of keeping people from fighting with strangers
Rating: 44
0Comments

IF SOMEONE CALLS ME FAT...

IF SOMEONE CALLS ME FAT - I don’t get angry. I just turn the other chin
Rating: 34
0Comments

I DON'T BELIEVE IN MIRACLES...

I DON'T BELIEVE IN MIRACLES - I rely on them
Rating: 27
0Comments

I NEED A CREDIT CARD...

I NEED A CREDIT CARD - that can afford my lifestyle
Rating: 25
0Comments

FAIRY TALE:...

FAIRY TALE: - A horror story to prepare children for the newspapers
Rating: 37
0Comments

YOU CAN DRINK AND YOU CAN THINK...

YOU CAN DRINK AND YOU CAN THINK - but a real professional never mixes the two
Rating: 31
0Comments

EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES...

EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES - The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking
Rating: 25
0Comments

THOSE WHO JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS...

THOSE WHO JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS - often land in ignorance
Rating: 39
0Comments

WIPE YOUR MOUTH...

WIPE YOUR MOUTH - There’s still a tiny bit of bullshit around your lips
Rating: 22
0Comments

A LEADING AUTHORITY...

A LEADING AUTHORITY - is anyone who has guessed right more than once
Rating: 43
0Comments

GO AND MAKE THAT FUCKING SANDWICH YOURSELF!...

GO AND MAKE THAT FUCKING SANDWICH YOURSELF! -
Rating: 53
0Comments

WHY IS DIVORCE SO EXPENSIVE?...

WHY IS DIVORCE SO EXPENSIVE? - Because it’s worth it
Rating: 41
0Comments

LITE:...

LITE: - the new way to spell “Light,” now with 20% fewer letters!
Rating: 29
0Comments

WOMEN ARE THE ONLY PEOPLE I KNOW...

WOMEN ARE THE ONLY PEOPLE I KNOW - who can go out broke and come home drunk
Rating: 28
0Comments

I TALK TO MYSELF A LOT...

I TALK TO MYSELF A LOT - it bothers people, though, because I use a megaphone
Rating: 45
0Comments

ADMIT NOTHING...

ADMIT NOTHING - deny everything and make counter-accusations
Rating: 26
0Comments

SMOKING DOESN'T KILL PEOPLE...

SMOKING DOESN'T KILL PEOPLE - People who are trying to quit smoking kill people
Rating: 42
0Comments

ALL I EVER WANTED...

ALL I EVER WANTED - was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work
Rating: 44
0Comments

I CAN HANDLE PAIN...

I CAN HANDLE PAIN - until it hurts
Rating: 23
0Comments

IF I AGREED WITH YOU...

IF I AGREED WITH YOU - we’d both be wrong
Rating: 45
0Comments

THE REAL REASON...

THE REAL REASON - you're late for work
Rating: 23
0Comments

IT'S EASIER TO GET OLDER...

IT'S EASIER TO GET OLDER - than it is to get wiser
Rating: 27
0Comments

I MUST BE A PROCTOLOGIST...

I MUST BE A PROCTOLOGIST - because I work with a*sholes
Rating: 38
0Comments

SURE YOU CAN TRUST THE GOVERNMENT!...

SURE YOU CAN TRUST THE GOVERNMENT! - Just ask a native American!
Rating: 22
0Comments

ONE CARELESS MATCH CAN START A FOREST FIRE...

ONE CARELESS MATCH CAN START A FOREST FIRE - but it takes a whole box to start a campfire
Rating: 51
0Comments

"DEJA POO"...

"DEJA POO" - The strange feeling you just changed that diaper ten seconds ago
Rating: 25
0Comments

IF THE UNIVERSE WANTED ME TO BE THIN...

IF THE UNIVERSE WANTED ME TO BE THIN - food wouldn’t taste so good
Rating: 43
0Comments

I'M NOT A GREAT LOVER...

I'M NOT A GREAT LOVER - but at least I’m fast
Rating: 29
0Comments

THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF PEDESTRIANS...

THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF PEDESTRIANS - The quick and the dead
Rating: 24
0Comments

LYING ABOUT MY AGE...

LYING ABOUT MY AGE - is easier now that I sometimes forget what it is
Rating: 40
0Comments

IN SOME CULTURES...

IN SOME CULTURES - what I do would be considered normal
Rating: 33
0Comments

MOST PEOPLE HAVE TWO REASONS...

MOST PEOPLE HAVE TWO REASONS - for what they do.. a good reason and the real reason
Rating: 31
0Comments

DON'T LET YOUR SUPERIORS KNOW...

DON'T LET YOUR SUPERIORS KNOW - you are better than they are
Rating: 49
0Comments

MY EX-WIFE ASKED ME FOR A PRESENT...

MY EX-WIFE ASKED ME FOR A PRESENT - that “goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds” – so I bought her a bathroom scale
Rating: 34
0Comments

WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE...

WHAT A LOVELY SURPRISE - to finally discover how unlonely being alone can be
Rating: 41
0Comments

I INTEND TO LIVE FOREVER...

I INTEND TO LIVE FOREVER - So far, so good
Rating: 43
0Comments

THERE'S A NEW DEVICE THAT TURNS...

THERE'S A NEW DEVICE THAT TURNS - thought to speech. I’ve had that for years now. It’s called alcohol.
Rating: 49
0Comments

TRUST ME...

TRUST ME - Tight fit jeans and loose fit skin are one bad combination
Rating: 23
0Comments

I DON'T MIND RUNNING INTO DEBT...

I DON'T MIND RUNNING INTO DEBT - It’s running into my creditors that’s embarrassing
Rating: 37
0Comments

DO YOU LAUGH...

DO YOU LAUGH - or slowly make a U-turn when you see this sign?
Rating: 40
0Comments

POLITICS...

POLITICS - One day ago they were threatening each other with nukes
Rating: 6
0Comments

YOUR CAR...

YOUR CAR - is a symbol of your life
Rating: 44
0Comments

THANKS TO THOSE WHO CAME INTO MY LIFE AND...

THANKS TO THOSE WHO CAME INTO MY LIFE AND - made it good. And thanks to those who came out of it and made it even better
Rating: 34
0Comments

GETTING OLDER MEANS I NO LONGER HAVE THE ENERGY...

GETTING OLDER MEANS I NO LONGER HAVE THE ENERGY - to do many of the things I enjoy in life, for example being awake
Rating: 40
0Comments

WHEN I SAY 'I MISS SCHOOL'...

WHEN I SAY 'I MISS SCHOOL' - it means my ‘FRIENDS AND THE FUN’ not the ‘SCHOOL’
Rating: 28
0Comments

THE CLOSEST TO PERFECTION...

THE CLOSEST TO PERFECTION - a person ever comes is when they fill out a job application
Rating: 30
0Comments

IT'S NOT SUFFICIENT TO BE A SUCCESS...

IT'S NOT SUFFICIENT TO BE A SUCCESS - it is also necessary for your friends to be failures
Rating: 31
0Comments

LIFE'S TOO SHORT...

LIFE'S TOO SHORT - to look for the same pair of socks
Rating: 23
0Comments

ALL I WANT IS TO FIND A NICE PERSON...

ALL I WANT IS TO FIND A NICE PERSON - to hang out with until I drop dead. Not a lot to ask
Rating: 25
0Comments

YOU CAN'T BE LATE...

YOU CAN'T BE LATE - until you show up
Rating: 38
0Comments

ANYBODY CAN MAKE A MISTAKE...

ANYBODY CAN MAKE A MISTAKE - It takes real dedication to make all of them
Rating: 31
0Comments

SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE...

SO MANY STUPID PEOPLE - and so few asteroids
Rating: 25
0Comments

WARNING:...

WARNING: - I have an attitude, and I know how to use it
Rating: 34
0Comments

EXPERIENCE...

EXPERIENCE - is something you don’t get until just after you need it
Rating: 29
0Comments

MAIN GOALS IN MAN'S LIFE:...

MAIN GOALS IN MAN'S LIFE: - to love, to care and to create
Rating: 24
0Comments

WHY DO GUYS CHEAT...

WHY DO GUYS CHEAT - on the most gorgeous woman with the ugliest creature?
Rating: 42
0Comments

MONEY CAN'T BUY HAPPINESS...

MONEY CAN'T BUY HAPPINESS - but it sure makes misery easier to live with
Rating: 38
0Comments

COMPLAIN...

COMPLAIN - To explain your pain for no gain
Rating: 21
0Comments

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER...

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER - if you know it about the right person
Rating: 23
0Comments

OF COURSE I'M OUT OF MY MIND....

OF COURSE I'M OUT OF MY MIND. - It’s dark and scary in there.
Rating: 21
0Comments

THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE UNSEEN...

THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE UNSEEN - That’s why we close our eyes when we kiss, sleep and dream
Rating: 36
0Comments

I GENERALLY AVOID TEMPTATION...

I GENERALLY AVOID TEMPTATION - unless I can’t resist it
Rating: 29
0Comments

EVERY TIME I HEAR A RECORDING OF MY OWN VOICE...

EVERY TIME I HEAR A RECORDING OF MY OWN VOICE - I’m convinced that I would not be friends with me if I were someone else
Rating: 47
0Comments

LIVE EVERY WEEK...

LIVE EVERY WEEK - like it’s shark week
Rating: 40
0Comments

YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED MIDDLE AGE...

YOU KNOW YOU'VE REACHED MIDDLE AGE - when your wife tells you to suck in your stomach and you just did
Rating: 25
0Comments

AT CNN...

AT CNN - No news is bad news but bad news is good news
Rating: 43
0Comments

IF YOU FIND YOURSELF IN A HOLE...

IF YOU FIND YOURSELF IN A HOLE - the first thing to do is stop diggin’
Rating: 29
0Comments

IF I EVER HAVE AN OUT-OF-BODY EXPERIENCE...

IF I EVER HAVE AN OUT-OF-BODY EXPERIENCE - I’m going to try to come back to a different one
Rating: 45
0Comments

A COMMITTEE...

A COMMITTEE - is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours
Rating: 25
0Comments

EVOLUTION,...

EVOLUTION, - do your job...
Rating: 56
0Comments

WE NEVER REALLY GROW UP...

WE NEVER REALLY GROW UP - we only learn how to act in public
Rating: 38
0Comments

WHEN I HANDWRITE AN ENTIRE PAGE...

WHEN I HANDWRITE AN ENTIRE PAGE - it looks like I’ve had a stroke by paragraph two
Rating: 47
0Comments

SARCASM...

SARCASM - helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them
Rating: 33
0Comments

IF YOU THINK THINGS CAN'T GET ANY WORSE...

IF YOU THINK THINGS CAN'T GET ANY WORSE - it’s probably only because you lack sufficient imagination
Rating: 28
0Comments

NEVER ALLOW SOMEONE TO BE YOUR PRIORITY...

NEVER ALLOW SOMEONE TO BE YOUR PRIORITY - while allowing yourself to be their option
Rating: 37
0Comments

YOU CAN'T CONTROL EVERYTHING IN LIFE...

YOU CAN'T CONTROL EVERYTHING IN LIFE - hair is a perfect example of it
Rating: 28
0Comments

MY TEACHERS KEPT TELLING ME...

MY TEACHERS KEPT TELLING ME - that Tetris won't help me in life
Rating: 34
0Comments

LEARN TO ENJOY LIFE WITHOUT ALCOHOL,...

LEARN TO ENJOY LIFE WITHOUT ALCOHOL, - to dream without drugs and to socialize without smoking
Rating: 48
0Comments

YOU DO SOMETHING GOOD AND THEY INSTANTLY FORGET IT...

YOU DO SOMETHING GOOD AND THEY INSTANTLY FORGET IT - you do something wrong and they will remember it for the rest of their life
Rating: 34
0Comments

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO TALK TO A 3-YEAR-OLD...

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO TALK TO A 3-YEAR-OLD - so you could understand your life newly
Rating: 29
0Comments

I LIKE ALL OF MY MUSIC IN MY PLAYER, EXCEPT...

I LIKE ALL OF MY MUSIC IN MY PLAYER, EXCEPT - when it’s on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my list
Rating: 42
0Comments

SOCIETY IS NEVER GOING TO MAKE ANY PROGRESS...

SOCIETY IS NEVER GOING TO MAKE ANY PROGRESS - until we all learn to pretend to like each other
Rating: 29
0Comments

GUESS WHO GOT FIRED?...

GUESS WHO GOT FIRED? -
Rating: 33
0Comments

IF IT'S GOOD, IT'S WONDERFUL...

IF IT'S GOOD, IT'S WONDERFUL - if it’s bad, it’s experience…no regrets
Rating: 42
0Comments

HISTORY TELLS A STORY...

HISTORY TELLS A STORY - That’s why you must always clear it before your girlfriend uses the computer
Rating: 49
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PEOPLE THAT ARE ORGANIZED...

PEOPLE THAT ARE ORGANIZED - are just too lazy to look for things
Rating: 40
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A GOOD WAY TO SAVE FACE...

A GOOD WAY TO SAVE FACE - is to keep the lower half shut
Rating: 31
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THE FIRSTI TIME I SEE A JOGGER SMILING...

THE FIRSTI TIME I SEE A JOGGER SMILING - I’ll consider it
Rating: 29
0Comments

I NO LONGER QUESTION AUTHORITY...

I NO LONGER QUESTION AUTHORITY - I annoy authority. More effect, less effort
Rating: 30
0Comments

THE FUTURE OF AMERICAN WOMEN IS BEING LED BY...

THE FUTURE OF AMERICAN WOMEN IS BEING LED BY - role models like Snooki, Lindsay Lohan, Nicki Minaj… we’re totally screwed
Rating: 33
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HAVING ONE CHILD MAKES YOU A PARENT...

HAVING ONE CHILD MAKES YOU A PARENT - Having two makes you a referee
Rating: 26
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IT WILL BE WEIRD...

IT WILL BE WEIRD - when names like Heather and Ashley are old people names
Rating: 29
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LEISURE...

LEISURE - is the mother of philosophy
Rating: 27
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OF ALL THE THINGS I'VE LOST...

OF ALL THE THINGS I'VE LOST - I miss my mind the most
Rating: 31
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MY DOCTOR THINKS I'M PARANOID...

MY DOCTOR THINKS I'M PARANOID - He didn’t say it, but I knew that’s what he was thinking
Rating: 23
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WHEN A MAN SPEAKS, PEOPLE LISTEN, THEN LOOK....

WHEN A MAN SPEAKS, PEOPLE LISTEN, THEN LOOK. - When a woman speaks, people look; then, if they like what they see, they listen.
Rating: 45
0Comments

DON'T TELL ME HOW HARD YOUR WORK...

DON'T TELL ME HOW HARD YOUR WORK - Tell me how much you get done
Rating: 47
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THEY SAY THAT AGE IS ALL IN YOUR MIND...

THEY SAY THAT AGE IS ALL IN YOUR MIND - The trick is to keep it from creeping down into your body
Rating: 21
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THERE IS NOTHING SO SMALL...

THERE IS NOTHING SO SMALL - it can’t be blown out of proportion
Rating: 38
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MEN ARE LIKE GOVERNMENT BONDS...

MEN ARE LIKE GOVERNMENT BONDS - they take so long to mature
Rating: 26
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DO NOT ARGUE WITH AN IDIOT...

DO NOT ARGUE WITH AN IDIOT - He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience
Rating: 51
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YOU LAUGH BECAUSE I'M DIFFERENT...

YOU LAUGH BECAUSE I'M DIFFERENT - I laugh because you’re all the same
Rating: 55
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THE WORST PART ABOUT LOOKING FOR A JOB...

THE WORST PART ABOUT LOOKING FOR A JOB - is finding one
Rating: 27
0Comments

ONE OF THE BIGGEST FEARS IN LIFE...

ONE OF THE BIGGEST FEARS IN LIFE - to find 31 missed calls from your mother
Rating: 34
0Comments

WARNING:...

WARNING: - Objects in mirror are fatter than they appear
Rating: 27
0Comments

DANCE...

DANCE - like no one’s going to put it on YouTube
Rating: 33
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REALITY...

REALITY - is for people who can’t use the internet
Rating: 42
0Comments

A WOMAN KNOWS SHE'S WEARING A RIGHT DRESS...

A WOMAN KNOWS SHE'S WEARING A RIGHT DRESS - when her man wants to take it off
Rating: 32
0Comments

I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM...

I DON'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM - I drink. I get drunk. I fall down. No problem.
Rating: 48
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PEOPLE...

PEOPLE - are extremely open minded when you agree with them
Rating: 32
0Comments

IF GUYS HAD PERIODS...

IF GUYS HAD PERIODS - they’d brag about the size of their tampons
Rating: 29
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MAN DOES NOT LIVE BY WORDS ALONE...

MAN DOES NOT LIVE BY WORDS ALONE - despite the fact that sometimes he has to eat them
Rating: 25
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AFTER A CERTAIN AGE...

AFTER A CERTAIN AGE - they become less like “birthdays” and more like “sell-by dates”
Rating: 40
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IN SCHOOL...

IN SCHOOL - I always gave 110%.. no wonder I flunked math
Rating: 32
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I REMEMBER, FONDLY, THE DAYS WHEN I WAS...

I REMEMBER, FONDLY, THE DAYS WHEN I WAS - a Perfect Parent, with Perfect Children. Back before I actually had any kids
Rating: 40
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A FLASHLIGHT...

A FLASHLIGHT - is a case for holding dead batteries
Rating: 29
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MUCH LIKE SUPERMAN...

MUCH LIKE SUPERMAN - I have a Fortress of Solitude. But mine flushes
Rating: 27
0Comments

THE DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE...

THE DAY WITHOUT SUNSHINE IS LIKE - night
Rating: 46
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THE SHINBONE...

THE SHINBONE - is a device for finding furniture in a dark room
Rating: 32
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CAT RULE #2...

CAT RULE #2 - Get plenty of sleep so you can play at 4am
Rating: 40
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HABITS, BABIES AND PROMISES...

HABITS, BABIES AND PROMISES - Way easier to make than keep
Rating: 46
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IT WOULD BE VERY HELPFUL TO ME...

IT WOULD BE VERY HELPFUL TO ME - if the rest of you would please stop striving for excellence. Thanks!
Rating: 33
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THE ONLY THING THE DOCTOR FOUND ENCOURAGING...

THE ONLY THING THE DOCTOR FOUND ENCOURAGING - about my test results was they weren’t his
Rating: 20
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I READ AN ARTICLE THE OTHER DAY THAT SAID...